I recently read an articled titled “Looking Straight at Gay Parents” in USA Today. The controversy over same sex families has become a mainstream issue in contemporary American society. Gay parenting is a major issue in our news and media, and since it is election year, many candidates are on the hot seat when it comes to the question of civil unions and gay marriage. According to the article, Kim Musheno is about to give birth to a child in April, thanks to Victor Zaborsky, a gay man who is the child’s biological father. When the baby is born, both Zaborsky and Kim’s partner will be there. Zaborsky stated, “We are forging new territory here. There are no role models.” As complex as this situation is, it is not impossible to achieve. The more the child is around people who care for him/her, the better everything will turn out. As this issue is getting more and more attention, it is certain that same sex parents are capable of taking care of a child together. It is estimated about 3 million children being raised by gay parents. Gay men have come to adopt children more than lesbians.
The article mainly looks at the concerns for children. David Jolliffe, a gay father to an orphan, states, “There are a lot of children who need families and love, and a parent’s protection and guidance. I think that can be provided by people regardless of their sexual orientation.” There are many children who are left in shelters and foster homes in America; they are moved from site to site, never finding a family (usually heterosexual) that wishes to keep them. Now that gay men are willing to take them in, it allows all parties to be fulfilled. Musheno has some concerns about her children when they grow up. When the children are playing with others, will they get picked on about their parents? She said she realized that children get picked on for many reasons, for example because they are short, or fat, or walk funny. Children are children. If our educational institutions become more complex and less binary, children will be able to accept anything and anyone as “right.”
On the other hand, Abigail Garner said that there actually is a difference with children raised by homosexual parents. She was raised by her father and his partner shortly after her parents divorced. She loved her father and his partner and had a lot of fun with them. The problem she faced was not one that was obvious. As she stated, she felt that she had to be perfect. How can a child be perfect? Children are supposed to make mistakes and learn from them. Garner feared if she was not perfect, others may find her flaws are reasons to object to her father’s care. She also feared that her father would be attacked by someone who objects to homosexuality. Even though she was not a lesbian, she had to constantly be reminded about homosexuality. Many of us do not have to remember that our parents are straight because it is all we know. When a child has to keep that in their mind, it adds a lot of pressure on them. As a consequence, they can isolate themselves from others.
Another gay-raised child is Courtney Puckett. Her mother was the love of her life. Courtney later became a lesbian herself. She states that the hardest person to come out to was her mother. Not because her mother would not approve, but rather because her mother would be disappointed that she could not raise a “normal” child. Courtney’s mother will be looked at by others and will be blamed for Courtney’s identity.
President Bush is trying to ban same sex marriage and civil unions. Gay parents feel that they would like to be considered as equals with straight couples. They need to be able to support their children and have health insurance coverage. If their child goes to the hospital, they need to have to right to be with their child. All of these things are of huge concern if Bush passes a constitutional amendment against gay marriage.
Same sex parents are capable of taking care of a child; they have proved to promote positive things for their families. It might be hard for the child and they might have to carry more baggage than other children, but with education, society will become more accepting allowing these children to be free and accepted as “normal.”
